12/20/11

She is blessings personified



She is blessings personified; she is my own new teacher
Was not happy as I was clambering arduous to live a life
Cherished heavily to change myself as I didn’t want to fail
My desire for success was enormous, but none defended
I found myself entrapped in the barbarous paws of desolation,
The inevitable failure haunted and I seemed myself to delay
Sought a lot to mount the heights, but it was hard being solitary
On the way of endeavor to reach heights, I met her, my teacher
She is kind, honest, understanding, helpful, caring and listening
She always stood beside to make me reach my goals and heights
We never saw each other’s face, yet she is someone who is close
Felt the gentle touch of her soul, that strengthens my humble efforts
Knowingly or unknowingly she boosted my confidence with support
Hard to get words for my new teacher other than “blessings personified”
My soul convinces my heart that, she is a real gift from heaven…
Dear Teacher, my heart is overwhelming with love and respect and….
By abiding, I find it difficult to express my love to you, my teacher
My heart calls for only one thing reign!!! Reign!!! Reign!!! As always



12/13/11

Still I am the same- your childhood friend




 “A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out”, the very famous quotation of Madam, Grace Pulpit is not just a quotation for me. It is life for me as I have seen that real and true friend who came in to my heart and life when all others have left me to suffer death. Friend, when all others were ready to leave me to die, you never could even think of leaving me and today how could you leave me alone in the midst of tears? You are the one who imparted life in me. Your love and care imparted motion on me and how could you leave me without reason?  

I do remember your happiness in each achievement of mine. You remembered and celebrated my birthdays and you never find your birthday as attractive. Before eating something, you always made sure that I am not hungry. You were the happiest when my letters saw light in black ink for the first time. I know you still keep each pages of my write ups. I know you can’t leave me like this in a fine day as you were closer to me than my mother. No, you were my mother in most of the time. You made an unending stream of love from your heart to me and I could see my mother in you. Dear you are my mom!!!

Have you forgotten both of us going together to school? You always used to carry my bags; you wanted me to be free and comfortable. We never were ready to accept the fact that one plus one is two. With our deep rooted friendship, we made a new calculation and it is one plus one is one and that is ‘we’. You supported me in each of my venture to swim against the currents. If you were not there, what would have been me, I don’t know. You were my father, not my friend…With those love and care, you made my father and I would like to find my dad in you!!!! Dear you are my dad!!!

Your smile made my life; your music brought hope into my disappointed heart. Without saying much you imparted confidence in me.  I do realize the importance of silence from you as your silence imparted a lot into me growing as a person. You always made sure that I have completed all my lessons. You sometimes left your studies to ensure that I am not leaving it. Don’t you think that a mere friend will never do that? Yes dear, you are more than that to me, like a sister, ‘not like’….You are my sister!!!!

While in college, you were there to create protective arms around me. No boys or even girls dared to approach me with wrong intentions as I was not open. I was safe within your protective arms. You never failed even a bit in taking care of me. You never forgot my tuition classes and other engagements. You used to take risk of going into muddied ponds to get lotus flowers for me. I am not sure only a friend can do all these things…You were caring me like a brother….Dear, I have brothers, yet I could see the real meaning of brother only in you…You are my brother!!

Yes friend, you were not a mere friend to me and you are not a mere friend to me. Sometimes you were my mother, and in some other times you were my daughter… In our past there were times we dreamed together, when we laughed and cried together. Friend, I value you a lot….more than anything else in this world, I need you. My heart sinks for you.  You can’t leave me like that…..Friend, I tried a lot o keep you apart…but now tired of trying, sick of crying. Trying to wear a smile on my face but dying inside. I always wanted you to live for 100 years and I die on the previous day of your death. I cannot think of a world where you are not there. You must come back to me . No friend, you have failed, I won…as I am confident that I can make you realize that I am your small little true childhood friend



12/8/11

My true friend




Searching synonym of the term friend

I reached beside her, who is my friend

She is kind, she is friendly and caring

She is loyal and has a sensitive heart

She is humorous and has a funny temper

Being honest, she is my best friend

She is special, stimulating and impudent

True and broad at heart, she is my friend

Confiding, pardoning, pleasant and vivid

Without a bit of spite, she is my true friend

She is one of a kind, unlike from others

Benevolent, delighting, lovely and beautiful

Affirmative, heedful, felicitous and spirited

Not just another... She is unique sans choice.

Grateful, tender and treasured alike gold

Her friendship will always grow as strong

She's there always to console and comfort

Even in absence, she consoles and cares

She makes feel that she does always be for me.

Yes! She is the fine specimen of a true friend



I had a frightening dream last night



I had a scary dream last night. It was a nightmare in which I have seen my right hand is getting separated from my body. I went to consult a lady doctor who was happened to be a nun. When she touched my hand, it got completely separated from the body and there was no blood. I was confused and wanted to go to a hospital where the doctor could do a surgery and bring my hand together with my body. As there was no pain, I was not unhealthy, but I was worried, worried like hell. I could not even imagine about a life without my right hand. I looked at the nun with tears. She was calm and she put the hand back to my body again, which could stick to its place as if there is no drift, but whenever I take some weight or work hard situation, it will again detach from my body. The nun asked me to be careful with the hand. In the next part of the dream, I was dancing in a stage. It was a group dance and nobody expected me to dance well with a damaged hand. But I managed to dance well. All were congratulating me for my talent and courage. I got the prize, but all were looking at me with sympathetic eyes which I did not like.  

Suddenly my phone rang and I woke up to see that my hand is alright and well fixed in my body. I thanked God for the great blessing he gave as my hands. I could not understand why I had such a dream. I browsed on the net to find the reason for such nightmares. Almost all the psychologists suggested that stress and anxiety are the main reasons for nightmares. Based on the knowledge received from different authoritative websites, I started analyzing my situation. I slept alone in the first floor of a road side building, the insecurity feeling in my heart might make my unconscious mind to appear as a dream. I have a lot of mental tension on the reason that I don’t have a kid. Might be this could arise my mind to have such a weird dream.  The best friend in my life left me a few days back saying that she made a mistake by selecting me as her friend without thinking intelligently. Might be her loss affected my thoughts. I am a person who always does have a disturbed sleep. I often speak in the midst of sleep, a minimal symptom of somnambulism. It also must have the reason for this scary dream. Most of all, I was having health problems, because of which I could not eat and sleep well for two days.

Any of these might have contributed to my dream.  Whatever is it, nightmares are tools and messengers to make us realize that we are in stress and strain and it is time for us to relax. If you are not able to relax even though you have repeated nightmares, you can meet a psychiatric anytime soon is the final conclusion. Have a look at the words of Tianna Galgano, author of the book “Decipher your dreams, decipher your life”- “In adults, nightmares can be caused by fears about the stressful situations in one's life. Job or money worries, a serious illness, deep insecurity, the potential loss of one's home--any of these can cause bad dreams or nightmares. The problem with comprehending that your dream is addressing a waking-day fear, is that the nighttime 'review' version is fraught with terrifying 'substitution' symbolism. If you are fearful of snakes, and dream about a snake biting you, the dream is NOT warning you that a snake may attack you in your real life. The 'dream-substitution' phenomenon has come into play. Most of you will not make the connection between the scary snakes attacking you in the night--with the worrisome physical illness you suffer during the day. You may not realize that the dream monster chasing you--actually represents your fears about being out of work and not having enough money to pay your bills.” (http://ezinearticles.com/?Nightmares-Are-Messengers---How-to-Release-Nightmare-Fears-With-EFT-Meridian-Tapping&id=5986211). If you can understand the meaning of nightmares and scary dreams like this, you can have a good life. Reduce tension and stress, live a relaxed life.



12/7/11

The greatness of being a woman


I was in standard 6 when I first saw a blood coated clothe in the school toilet. It appeared like a proof of a big crime in the old toilet building of the school. As a child, I got shocked and ran to the teacher to tell about the crime. The teacher did not seem to be serious and she instructed the sweeper to clean the toilet. I was confused on the ignorance shown by the teacher as I was thinking about the crime and source of that blood.

Years went by and many of my friends came out of ignorance about that blood and enjoyed the feeling of being a woman. I still was ignorant and thought it might be because of some wrong –doings of people. I have seen my mother and all others suffering with the so called ‘great feeling of being a woman’. Leg pain, back pain, head ache…no pain could spare the woman from enjoying this.

I have seen my friends and cousins look at boys with a special admiration and adoration, but I never find anything significant in boys in comparison to girls. I did not consider them as superior to girls. I considered them as my friends and loved to play basket ball with them as these silly girls do like gossiping than such nice plays.

Being the daughter of a drunkard father and an ignorant mother, I had a very troubled childhood and might be because of this God made me live my childish life to the fullest and waited to give me time till I complete my tenth form. After the public examination of standard 10, I preferred to research on death as I started loving death, my troubled life accelerated my feeling towards death. Each day and night I sat and prayed for death.

One night I was praying to God for death and I believed that “death will come today”. I closed my eyes and awaited death and something came into me. I was not sure that it is not death as the new feeling took me into another world. I was confused and opened my eyes to see the new world. It was the world of women. I closed my eyes again and for the first time in my life, I prayed for the well being of the entire world.

I could sense life in my body. I was really excited as it seemed that my body is preparing itself for giving birth to generations. Suddenly I had feeling of completeness and perfection in my own personality even though I realized an inner urge and deprivation for something unknown. On the spur of the moment, everything went wrong and there was a feel of loss .My body, that was ready to give birth, became disappointed and I perceived my womb shedding tears. I could palpate the flow of blood coated tears from my womb.

I was confused on these sudden changes, which were really fresh to me. I found a drastic change in every single thought of mine. I looked at the rose flower I kept on the dining table that morning. I was really happy to pluck it from the rose plant to own it, but now my heart is sinking in sorrow while looking at it as I was thinking of the pain it would have undergone while getting detached from the plant.  For the very first time in life, I had a soft corner for my mom who was trying hard to make both ends meet.

After a few days of rest, I went out to see the outside world. I just want to make sure that it is the same world, but miraculously it got changed. I felt that men are great beings than women, though I felt their crazy nature as stupidity. I found myself detaching the company of boys and getting closer to girls. I also started gossiping with them with a feeling that we are doing something really great.

Today, I love the entire world and want it to be happy. I believe that being a woman is the greatest thing on earth. I find myself capable of doing great things. A man has limitations to do things, but women have no limitations. Both man and woman can dream of going to space and such sort of adventures, but men can’t deliver and feed the child.

I do respect man for being a part of the reproduction process. Thanks to cloning that made women independent from men. Today in physical terms, a woman can think of a world without man, whereas man will find it difficult, but being a woman, I cannot think of a life without my man, as I love him a lot…I cant even think of a life without him.

I asked myself what made me think like this when science is ready to help me and all other women to have a life without man. I don’t know how to explain the psychology and philosophy of this feeling. My answer is simple. I could know the meaning of safety and security for the first time within his hands. I feel that I am 'the safest' within his hands. Now I understand, 'the greatness in the feeling of being a woman' is to accept the 'greatness of man'.

How Anthony Burgess did become a writer?




At the age of forty, Antony diagnosed for brain tumor and was informed that he might not live for more than a year. This news shocked Burgess because his death could lead his wife Lynne to poverty and loneliness as he could not save anything till that day. He thought of several income generating business to save something for his wife, but, the disease was really serious and Antony was not permitted by doctors to go out for work. Finally he decided to write novels as he felt that he might do it. The royalty of the books could bring a long term income which could support Lynne to live.

Till that day, Antony had not written even a small story, yet Antony started writing. He was not sure about any publishers who could publish his books. He was not sure about the thought of success. But love and dedication paid the prize. Yes, necessity is the mother of invention. His love to his wife helped him to overcome all the problems in his writing career and he made a one year plan. It was in January 1960. He calculated the entire seasons and anticipated that he would not be able to the next winter. He made up to write the maximum in this short span of time and with hard work he completed five novels. The dedicated hard work and positive thinking reduced the intensity of the tumor and he had given hope to live. Very soon, a he got a miraculous healing and he could write 70 novels before death.

Antony’s life reveals a very big fact about life. Will power is a great gift from heaven and we can watch miracles if we could use this divine gift well. God is capable of performing miracles if we face challenges in a very positive way. God respects your freedom of thought and will not override it at any cost. If you trust in God, you need to give a 100 percentage trust in God’s capabilities. Even 1 percentage faithlessness can make God helpless in performing miracles on you. If there is only one year ahead of you, you need to plan the year with God. Life offers a lot of limitations and uncertainty, if we could recognize this fact, we can face life with more enthusiasm and inspiration.


 

Jisha Jagadeesh

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It's Me The Miracle by Jisha Jagadeesh is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License